Hey Big Brother Beer!
I hope you will have time to answer this question. I need some advice. BAD.
I am a licensed, certified, union electrician. Due to the seasonal nature of my job, I have weeks, sometimes months, of down time in the winter. Thanks to the recession, this last winter I had more time off than usual. If that was my only problem, I wouldn’t be bothering you. It’s the demands that are placed on me and my skill set during my off time by my family, mainly my mom.
I know my mom means well, but every time one of our relatives so much as mentions an electrical problem or project that they are in the middle of, she tells them I would be glad to help them out. That’s true, but only to a point. I have no problem dropping by and looking over a situation. I will gladly give anyone that asks me a list of several electrical contractors who do home repair and improvements, and whose work I trust. What’s causing the problem is quite few times lately I’ve been expected to not only fix the problem and/or finish the project, but also to supply them with whatever materials are needed. Oh, and I would do it for free. They were told by my mom that I would “have that stuff laying around.”
The hell of it is, I do give back. I’ve worked on the wiring in three Habitat for Humanity homes in the last two years. Last year my sister’s house was damaged by fire, and I put time in every day until it was livable again, and I never asked for a dime.
I’ve tried talking to her about this, but she gets pretty testy about it. She thinks that because I have this time off, that I should be helping out the family. I know she’s just guilt tripping me, but what do I do to keep the peace?
Signed,
Hope I Don’t Sound Like a Dick
I don’t think you sound like a dick, HIDLaD, but that doesn’t mean you aren’t one.
If you work in one of the unions that I know of that take a winter break, I can understand why your time off is so important to you. And it SHOULD be. When you work eighty-plus hours a week nine or ten months out of the year, a two or three month break isn’t just nice, it’s necessary. I would find it hard to believe that anyone who has ever worked for a living would have much trouble understanding that.
Not implying your mom is a layabout, HIDLaD, but she does sound a tad unreasonable. I would be willing to bet that your relatives would be more understanding. Instead of locking horns with your mom over this, why not just handle it when the call comes from the relatives? Explain it to them just like you explained it here. Let them know what services you are willing to provide. But make sure they understand that there is only so much you can do. Apologize for your mom’s presumptive endorsement if you have to, but I seriously doubt it will even come up. I think you will find that even your most freeloading relatives will take the hint, and let you enjoy a well deserved vacation.
Then again, maybe you really are a dick. Just kiddin’!!
Hugs and Kisses, Your Big Brother Beer.
